The Dark Truth

Last nights blog post hides the dark truth of what really happens when and INTJ with a child and ENFP with health problems get married and try to create a family.

So I don't know about other women but I certainly know about me. Every 2 weeks I have emotional outbursts and get ill. One is when I get my period right, that's normal. This is where husband is meant to open the door and throw in the chocolate and retreat to a safe distance and wait it out until I emerge my normal bubbly self, sometimes he may need to administer cuddles too. Recently he has stopped doing this and now only tries to retreat which makes it a whole lot worse and then I try to kill him (in my head of course). Then 2 weeks after that if mother nature isn't done playing her games with me she throws in ovulation sick! This is the time of the month I am meant to be a goddess, skin glowing, shining hair, a sexual being ready for husband to impregnate. WRONG! The only difference between my period and ovulation... Less zits!

How I hope to look...

How I actually look....

So last night husband arrives home late, I have been sat here stewing for a few hours, naked under my very (not) sexy pink fluffy dressing gown that I bought from the kids section at best and less, expect for my one hairy leg, that counts as clothes right? It's like yeti long! First of all I had to show him where I had chipped not 1 but 2 of our new doors in my endeavors to really clean our house. Trying to keep a lid on the emotions. You know like, they will stay in the box, he wont see my crazy today. But instead of being understanding and putting his arm around me, I mean I can see I am emosh can't he? So instead Mr INTJ pops up and starts telling me it was not an accident, (clearly I did not do it on purpose) and that I need to self sooth. All you women out there please tell me I am not crazy that when I get sad I want a cuddle? Who wants to self sooth when their brain is running a million miles an hour all about how they are never going to be a mum and you don't care because you are already a dad.... The doors are gone from my mind, really this is not about the chuffing doors! Just pat me and tell me its all going to be ok.

I do feel sorry for husband really I do, since we met I had a bipolar episode, wanted to kill myself and him quite regularly, and now all the endo bs and hormones out of whack it can't be easy for him. I love him with all of me but seriously man give me a hug. Push the INTJ to the side for a tiny second, even if you just pat my arm dude. I will take that and know it means the world.

If you aren't familiar with personality types, there is a belief that there are 16 personality types that make up the population. Like everyone of us is 1 of these 16.

This called the Myers Briggs Personality Type.

It was created by a mother and daughter team which totally rocks. It is based on the theory there are four principal psychological functions by which humans experience the world – sensation, intuition, feeling, and thinking – and that one of these four functions is dominant for a person most of the time.

Now here is where I have been on a massive growth journey to really learn about this and embrace the difference between myself and Husband.

I am an ENFP - Extroverted, Intuition, Feeling, Feeling, Perception.

The ENFP personality is a true free spirit. They are often the life of the party, but unlike Explorers, they are less interested in the sheer excitement and pleasure of the moment than they are in enjoying the social and emotional connections they make with others. Charming, independent, energetic and compassionate, the 7% of the population that they comprise can certainly be felt in any crowd.

Husband is INTJ - Introverted, Intuition, Thinking, Judgement.

It’s lonely at the top, and being one of the rarest and most strategically capable personality types, INTJs know this all too well. INTJs form just two percent of the population, and women of this personality type are especially rare, forming just 0.8% of the population – it is often a challenge for them to find like-minded individuals who are able to keep up with their relentless intellectualism and chess-like maneuvering. People with the INTJ personality type are imaginative yet decisive, ambitious yet private, amazingly curious, but they do not squander their energy.

As you can see we are polar opposites, and when I get emotional this is a problem. I get emotional a lot. So while I fail to guide husband in the ways of comfort and compassion, I hope that through continuing to learn more about his personality type I will eventually one day bring harmony to our household.

To find out what your personality type is....

https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test