Actually Being Pregnant Part 1

Wow it has been a long time since I have written anything, and I can barely string a sentence together it feels. If you have been following me on the famous book of face or insta you will know I have been struggling with a difficult pregnancy and had to take a break from life.

Well I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl on Friday 29th June after an epic 40 hours of labour (I will tell you all about it later but for now let’s talk about the pregnancy.)

Before I knew I was pregnant Husband and I had a dirty weekend in Singapore and it was fab, shopping, food, sex and roller coasters!! Yep roller coasters little did I know I was 3 or weeks pregnant and my poor little fetus was being thrown about.

On our last day in Singapore I realised, mother nature hadn’t delivered my monthly present. My period being late wasn’t always unusual and I didn’t want to get my hopes up. By Monday it still hadn’t arrived, it was significantly later than usual. On my way to work I phoned Husband to tell him, his advice was “Don’t get your hopes up but do a test just in case.”

I drove straight to Priceline, ran straight to the pregnancy tests, then spent 30 mins trying to work out which one was the best. I grabbed the 2 pack first response and dashed to display, stopping at Wollies to grab some sushi, coz you know, I couldn’t possibly be pregnant but if I was I wanted to eat some sushi before I found out.

Once the sushi had been devoured it was time to take the test…. Obvs was going to be negative, but….

Still sat on the toilet I looked down at the test. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t decide if it was 2 lines or not. Was I really pregnant? I sent a photo to a friend. No reply. I sent the photo to my cousin no reply. Shit. I phoned Em Pem, one of my sisters “are you alone?” I asked. I sent her the picture and she phoned me back, “I think you are but I don’t know, I showed Lukey (the brother she lived with) he’s not sure and said don’t get your hopes up.” While the 3 of us deliberated, I sent the picture to another friend and Em Pem sent it to one of our friends in the UK. My friend replied within a second of me sending it.

And I really was shaking. I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t wait to tell Husband, he was in for a shock. I am pretty sure both of us felt it wasn’t on the cards, he was also apprehensive about me becoming pregnant due to me having Bipolar Disorder.

I had to find somewhere to pop this pic in....

I really do think I was wearing the best outfit to find out I was pregnant! Isn't it so shiny?!

I tried to plan some exciting way to tell him but when I phoned him to find out when he would be home, he knew something was up.

I took 2 more tests just to make sure, Husband couldn’t believe it.

I attended the friend HER class that night and couldn’t speak, I sat there in silence while I watched them learn how to do their make up. It was so hard to shout it from the roof top, but I was still in shock.

I found out I was pregnant on the Monday, on Tuesday I went to my GP to get confirmation, on Thursday she confirmed it. One of my girlfriends came with me to hold my hand, I was scared she would tell me it was wrong, and on Friday my Mum arrived. I hadn’t told mum yet, no one had. Which in our family is a miracle. If something happens you can guarantee someone tells you thinking you already know haha.

Husband, Step Daughter and I headed to airport to collect Mum from the airport and it was so hard not to just blurt it out. The whole way home I kept saying “Step Daughter is going straight to bed when we get home” (It was 11pm).

Once we had eventually got SD to bed I had a present for mum.

There were lots of tears all round and then we phoned all of Mum’s best friends to tell them. If you got one of these calls, we love you a lot!

Finding out I was pregnant was incredible. I was shocked, happy, excited, nervous and hundreds of other emotions too. Was it real? My view of pregnancy though was wrong, very, very wrong.

My Muma bear was a natural. She was made to be a mother. She really was. She always laughed at the women on tv or in the movies when they were heavily pregnant and struggling to move around easily or complaining about being pregnant. I remember her last pregnancy. She played golf and stoolball (I will share more about this amazing sport later) all the way through. She was incredible. She took a diving catch on the stoolball pitch about 8 weeks before she birthed the Ginger Ninja. Don’t even get me started on how easy she made labour look.

For me though; around 6 weeks when the sickness hit, I was not ready!! I thought I would be like mum.

To be continued…